In corporate America, a lot of people cross your path. People you directly work with; people you bump into only in the hallway or kitchen. And people who work for other companies that just happen to also share your building. But you get to know and recognize faces over the years - even if you only see each other every few months. And, maybe if you're lucky, you'll know their names or snippets of their life.
Well, over several years of working in a building, I got to know a man who I coined my "Elevator Buddy." We didn't work together, I didn't know his name or what he did. But every now and again, we'd do the friendly elevator nod, ask about how the weekend was or what we were doing for Summer vacation that year. Surface level stuff -- but over years, you recognize that soul.
I realized along the way that I hadn't seen my Elevator Buddy in quite a while, which wasn't uncommon. But, I had taken mental note of it and continued carrying out my work life.
Until the day I was rushing out for a lunch meeting.
I was rushing out (actually running) and I happened to quickly glance over my right shoulder and low and behold about 25 feet away, it was Elevator Buddy. But I almost missed him. The guy I knew was suddenly older looking, really thin, and either using a cane or a walker. And in that split second of recognition, our eyes met. And I'm sure I revealed a face of confusion as he revealed a face of trial.
But my feet were too quickly moving under me and I continued on my way to lunch. And for some reason, I knew that I already regretted my fast pace.
I didn't know his name. Dammit. So, asking around for him became difficult. But I did my best. To the doormen, "Do you know the guy who..." To randoms in elevators, "Do you work with a guy who..." To the smokers outside, "Have you seen a guy who..." Nothing.
Until one day, I was with another "familiar" in the elevator who said "Yes, I do. His name is Elliott and he was diagnosed with a terminal, fast moving cancer." And my brain kicked in: 'Shit. Why was lunch so important that day? Why didn't you stop!?' So, I responded, "Can you let him know that I'm asking for him?" And this familiar face said, "Let me give you his cell phone number and you can send him a text message." YES!!!!
When I got back to my office, I sat at my desk and got right down to typing (and, I figured, a photo couldn't hurt since he didn't know my name either):
I watched that text for days and weeks and nothing. No response. No call. No movement. Stalemate.
Perhaps a month went by and I bumped into "familiar face" again who had given me Elliott's phone number. And he shared that Elliott had passed away. Dismay. Discouragement. Sadness. Anger at myself for not stopping that day. I thanked "familiar face" and offered my condolences. And I continued on with my work life, just like everyone else around me who didn't know my Elevator Buddy.
I can beat myself up a lot. So, I wasn't letting myself off of the hook too easily. Every day for months I would arrive to my building and think about Elliott and my misstep. I would pray to him and say "Good morning, help me get through the work day! You are missed!" And on occasion I would sit in my office chair, look back on my text message and wish that he had responded so I would have known that he got it and that he was loved.
And one very such afternoon, I was doing just that. Re-reading my text and praying to Elliott. When my thumb must have touched the screen and it moved up just enough. And under my picture, this is what I saw:
READ 10/17/15. Three days after I sent my text message, Elliott had read it. While he was alive and fighting -- he got the message that someone was praying for him. Suddenly I was surrounded by warmth and calm and gratitude. Not only because I knew the message had been received, but because I knew this was his way of communicating to me that everything was good now and I could let it go.
FAST FORWARD...
After 13 years, my corporate office moved to a new building about 8 blocks away. I don't ride the same elevators or see the same familiar faces anymore, but I still pray to Elliott often as I'm arriving to work. And now knowing what I know, I wonder who else I might encounter on my commute that may change my life.
THE MESSAGE IS...
Life is a growing list of messages (lol):
-- STOP going so fast. Life is full of blessed moments that we miss because of our pace (especially in the NYC area).
-- Give yourself a break. We can't know all of the details of every moment -- if you don't make a correct choice, it's okay. Learn and grow and move forward.
-- Pray for the sick and the dying - and if you can, make a house call or send a text message or pick up the phone. You will both be glad that you did.
-- You never know whose life will impact you. You never know whose life you will impact. Choose to make your impact positive.
-- Be kind and love as much as possible. All of us are fighting some kind of war.
-- Pray to those who have passed on. They will let you know they're with you!
And most importantly...
Talk to people in elevators :)
xo
© 2018 Katie Riley
Comments